The Ant and the Grasshopper

Warning: May anger conservatives (and some liberals).

Many of you have heard the conservative take with the New Liberal Version of the "Ant and the Grasshopper." Well, here is another way to look at it.

Original Version:

New Liberal Version:

The Honest Version:

One Fall, the grasshopper is minding its own business, hopping along peacefully. The ant bribes the grasshopper's friends and neighbors so that they won't interfere while the ant and his buddies kidnap the grasshopper, make it lay inside of a boat for months on end, and drags it back to it's anthill. The grasshopper's hind legs are cut off and it is starved and whipped by the ant if it ever does anything that even remotely resembles hopping. It must crawl, like the ant does, or it is seen as inferior. The grasshopper is forced to work Fall, Winter, Spring, and most of the summer with no pay and in inhumane conditions. During the last week of Summer, other ants decide that it's no longer profitable to exploit the grasshopper, so they let it work on it's own. The grasshopper is never given it's legs back, is not allowed to have certain foods or keep most of what it earns, even though it's still only working with four legs and is not allowed to hop.

When Winter finally arrives, the grasshopper still manages to get enough food to survive and some sort of shelter, not NEARLY enough as the ant, but certainly an impressive amount considering what it has gone through at the hands of the ant.

Despite all of this, whenever the ant sees the grasshopper crawling slowly through the snow because it only has four legs and is not allowed to hop, and does not have as much wealth as the ant because it has not been paid for it's years of involuntary servitude, the ant still wonders why the grasshopper has a problem.

Weird, but true none the less!!!!

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